I'm big in Canada. Listen to my interview on CKNW
Radio Vancouver on Monday, August 25, at 12:40 ET. Save the date.
We'll be talking about the ALS Ice Bucket Challenge... though I'm
sure I'll have a couple extra minutes to slip in some thoughts about
my attic being haunted by the ghost of Thomas Jefferson.
It only took twelve years, but my first drama-novel,
branches, is finally
available on-line. (It took a while to translate into English, as
I originally wrote it in the less-common Uto-Aztecan language of
'Chemehuevi'.) You can purchase
branches for your Kindle, your Nook, your Blurber,
your Doodleboop, and pretty much any other electronic device-
including calculators and refrigerators.
Here's the book description...
Two worlds. Two
An investigative reporter, obsessed with solving a murder, is led
through a mystery that involves deep family secrets and powerful
Branches is a mystery novel in dramatic form, driven by a unique
dialogue style, about love and death and crime and redemption. And
it’s also funny.
I'm now part of the lamestream media. I am a blogger
for the Huffington Post. I look forward to sharing my worthless
opinions with the world.
Check out my posts. And feel free to write vicious
personal attacks in the "comments" section. It's okay. They're
news! My novel is now available on Amazon Kindle. Is that how I word
it? Amazon Kindle? Maybe "... on Amazon's Kindle"? Or "... on
the Amazon Kindle"? Well, whatever. It's available on
(It will be available on other on-line e-book outlets in a few
is called Believe What You Breathe. It's really good. You'll
like it. Buy it. Here's the link...
update: Believe What You Breathe is now
available for purchase on the Barnes & Noble Nook.
The Onion News Network segment, "Police Slog Through
40,000 Insipid Party Pics To Find Cause of Dorm Fire", based on my
original idea, has been nominated for a Webby award. (A Webby award
is the premiere honor given to the best content and design on the
Internet... but you already knew that.)
You can find our little movie all over the Internet.
Or just go to
update: They announced
the 2011 winners. We lost.
You don't understand Twitter?
Neither do I! You think Twitter represents the end of civilized
society as we know it? So do I!
Nevertheless, you can now
follow me on Twitter. My goal? Ten billion followers.
Here is a newspaper article about me. I'm on page 3. 'Chaos in
Libya' is on page 4. I'm bigger than Libya!
my mother's response upon seeing the article: "You need a
The election season is heating up. I did some
work for the Georgia gubernatorial* campaign. My commercials are
already running in the great state of Georgia. I love Georgia! I
like peaches and bulldogs and that Ray Charles song.
And now you know what the Georgia state flag
*My 46th best talent? I can type
“gubernatorial” without the use of spell check.
Big news! I
have a cool new job. I'm going to China as part of a panda-hunting
expedition, in hopes of controlling/reducing the world's panda
population. Also, I'm going to be a writer on a brand new show for
the Comedy Central network. Details to come.
Not only is TV a positive influence on teenagers, a
healthy substitute to reading, and the birthplace of the Olsen
Twins... now there is yet another wonderful thing to love about the
small screen. The Onion is coming to television!
Check out the link.
My job will consist of fetching doughnuts for the
producers, late night building security (11:00pm- 6:00am shift), and I
I'll also be a contributing writer.
Following in the footsteps of my hero,
Mark Twain, I'm one of the new Top Cops In Us Weekly
Magazine's popular "Fashion Police" section. My witty (and
important) fashion comments will appear in two or three issues a
I gave a presentation at Barnes & Noble. Afterwards, I had a chance
to meet Noble's mistress. I found her to be attractive, intelligent,